Answers are good

For the past few months we have been waiting to hear about Hubby's job, where the Head Shed wants him and how long we are going to have two homes.  The problem is, and it's actually not really a problem, the longer we are up home, the more it seems like home and the more comfortable it feels.  We, all four of us, love this new town and new friends and new church.  When I think about leaving and going back down home, it makes me sad, I keep thinking I want more time here.  But emotions are mixed because it will be nice to be back where we know that we will be forever.  I know at this point I am rambling, but it's hard to express how I feel.  Finally we have an answer, they want us to stay put a while longer.  I was so relieved because it is something that is not hanging in the balance any more.  I am excited about the prospect of hanging around here a while longer.  The potato plants are blooming and I'd love to see the harvest and now I know that we will be here to take part in it.  I know that soon after that the snow will be flying, but I'm okay with that.  Can you hear that sigh of relief? 

So, now to focus on the future, here, up home.  *contented sigh*

How much time has passed anyway?

A blog?  I have a blog?  Really?  Summer is wonderful.  It's my favorite, but it goes by way too fast, especially in the "tundra" that I live in.  The problem with summer is that we are always running here and there and everywhere soaking up every bit of vitamin D that one can possibly do in a northern climate.  The water is such a magnet when the temps soar, and I recgonize that temps soar to the upper 80's here, so that is a very relative term.  I say that I have the kiddos on a clubbing schedule, late to bed, late to rise.  Isn't that backward of what we are supposed to do?  But it's summer.  Today there is nothing to do except fix meals.  The house is clean, most of the laundry is done.  So after this information dump, I think I'll take my book outside and soak up those wonderfully warm rays of sunlight.

Speaking of books, I have fallen in love with David Baldacci.  He is great!  Love his books!  You like who dun 'em's?  This is good stuff.  The Camel Club is the first book in one of his series about, guess who?  The Camel Club.  Those guys are great!  I need more Camel Club since I have read them all now.  Please, Mr. Baldacci....I need another one!

School.  That's another thing in my long list of stressors at the moment.  We are homeschooling again this year and I'm excited about it because this year it's mine.  I have the ownership.  We will not be back down home anytime in the near future, if I can predict, so I'm not relying on the school as much as I did last year and that has a feeling of liberation to tell you the truth. 

Long list of stressors, you ask?  For the past year, I feel like we have been living on faith.  Faith that our Creator knows the best for our future and trusting Him to place our steps exactly where He wants them.  Hubby calls it being stretched.  I say, OUCH!  I'm dealing with my stretching day by day, but the last few days seem to have piled on a bit heavier than usual, and I'm sure there's hormonal issues involved, but it's been harder to keep it together.  I so wish that God would just show me what the plan is, let me glimpse into the future, but I know that's not happening, so again we are back to faith and stretching and ouch-ing and trusting.  My uncle said to me, Sarah, the Lord is always good.  He is.  I know it, way deep down I know it.  It's my life, how I've always lived, but that doesn't make it easy either.

Father, thank you for already knowing my family's future.  Thank you for directing us.  Help me to keep trusting and help me to always remember those memorial stones that have been set up previously to show me how you have always provided.

40 Days of Seeking Him - Day 29 ( I think! )

Suffering.  I have had heartache in my life, but suffering, I'm not really sure.  Jesus did.  A lot.  Last night our Pastor spoke on suffering and suffering well.  He went right to Job first off.  That man, how he got through what he did, I have no idea.  His wife, his best friends told him to curse God or that suffering was all his fault and he needed to get a grip, repent and stop sinning.  Then God spoke and shut them all up.

Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?  

Tell Me, if you have understanding.

Who determined its measurements

Surely you know!

Or who stretched the line upon it?

To what were it's foundations fastened?

Or who laid its cornerstone,

When the morning stars sang together,

And all the sons of God shouted for joy?

Job 38:4-7

God continues speaking in this fashion for another couple chapters reiterating that He alone is God and He alone knows why things happen they way that they do.  He never offers Job an explanation of why He did what He did and Job answers in the last chapter, "I know that You can do everything, that no purpose of Yours can be withheld from You."  Amazing.  After all that suffering, Job acknowledges that God has total control and Job seems to be okay with that.  Where else would we run under suffering?  The way of the world?  It holds nothing that can satisfy.  Only God alone has the comfort and the peace that our aching heart needs. 

The weeks leading to the cross, Jesus knew what lied ahead of Him.  The suffering that He experienced I cannot even comprehend.  We had lots of heartache in our life last week, did you see that post?  It puts everything in to perspective, what is important and what is not.  Pastor finished his message with familiar verses, but verses that bring comfort and strength.  I Peter 4:12 states: "Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you, but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy."  Now, I realize that Peter is writing this letter to Christian that are being persecuted and martyred for the sake of the Gospel and that is not happening to us in our trials and sufferings, but I do think that we can gain comfort through these words in any trial that we find ourselves in.  Our pastor closed with this charge that I hope I will always keep in mind, "Suffer well."

The Peace that Passes all Understanding

Last Thursday night Hubby got a call that a Game Warden Pilot and friend hadn't been heard from for a few hours but that they weren't too worried, it could be a simple explanation.  The reason Hubby was called was that it was happening in his Troop.  Everything changed when we woke up.  The pilot still had not been located and they were bring in the troops.  I got word a few hours later that he had been found inside his crashed plane and that he was dead.  This wasn't just any pilot to us, he was our friend, our neighbor for a few years back down south, he and his family attended our church there for years and Hubby had coached both his sons in high school basketball.  Hubby did a great job keeping it together and he was asked on Saturday to do the eulogy for the funeral.  Fast forward to Wednesday.  The funeral was attended by over 1500 uniformed officers.  Every Game Warden was there along with a large contingency of Troopers and other Maine LEO's.  Fish and Wildlife Officers from all over New England as well as other states were there too.  It was amazing to see them all together, all moving in unison, it made me fall in love with my law enforcement family all over again.  He was given a grand send off, but more importantly, he loved God very much and I know exactly where he is and I look forward to seeing him again.

Before the funeral began, my sister in law told me that she had just gotten a call from the hospital that Hubby's grandfather was not doing well at all.  She was headed to the hospital with my mother in law to say goodbye.  After the funeral we found out that he had a heart attack but was improving.  After Hubby had completed all his obligations for the funeral and burial, we headed to the hospital.  We found out that he had stabilized and was doing remarkably better. 

After a pretty good night sleep, one of the first in a week, Hubby headed to a meeting in the southern part of the state, I dropped the girls off at school and headed to visit a friend who is suffering from a brain tumor that is inoperable.  When I got there she told me that she was glad that she was doing worse because she is so ready to see Jesus and get to Heaven.  Her kids are a bit younger than I am her husband passed away unexpectedly 2 years ago.  She has fought cancer as long as I have known her, I've been around almost 15 years.  It was so much more emotional than I could have ever anticipated.  How often do you get to say goodbye to some one?  I have never had that opportunity.  To say goodbye to someone who has had a profound impact on your life as a Christian, as a wife and as a mom is so hard.  She must have apologized for the way that she looked 3 times before she said, "See, Sarah, God is still working on me and my pride!"  Her tumor has given her some paralysis on the right side of her face and she is quite swollen from the prednisone that she had been on.  It was so nice to be able to pray with her and feel her peace, the peace that only God can give.

After I got a grip and left the house, I called my SIL to see if she needed anything, she was still at the hospital with Gramp and I ended up running food over to the wife of the pilot for her.  When I got to the house, which I figured would be still packed with people, I found only her, her son and her son's girlfriend.  It was so nice to be able to sit down with her.  I told her how well she had done the day before at the funeral and she attested to the peace of God that passes all understanding, she put the emphasis on the "all".  We talked about how people without a faith in God get through all the hard things that life throws at us, neither of us had an answer. 

On our way to head back up north, we stopped to see Gramp again.  He was sitting up in bed and eating everything on his plate.  I'm so thankful for God's mercy on his life.  We got a big snow storm up here, 12-14" on April Fool's day for us.  Our regular plow man didn't plow us out, it was his brother.  I went to check Facebook because our plow man's daughter had twin babies at about 24 weeks gestation and one of the babies had not been doing well.  I found out that the baby had died last night.  I cannot imagine loosing a child.  The aunt of the baby had posted a message stating "Ella entered the presence of the Lord at 7:40pm and was completely healed at that moment".  Again, the peace that only God can give is radiating from this family feeling this heavy loss. 

Why God does what He does, I will never understand when so much heartache accompanies it.  I do trust Him though.  I know that He is working out His perfect plan and I'm thankful to be a part of it.  But what I know is that He give us His peace, His peace that passes all understanding, a peace that you have no comprehension of until the very moment that you need it and He alone gives it.  I am so thankful for this peace, how does one get along in life with out it? 

He heals the broken hearted

And binds up their wounds.

He counts the number of the stars;

He calls them all by name.

His understanding is infinite.

Psalm 147:3-5

Thursdays Tied with Love and Laughter

Over at Our Family Forest, check out Jen's Meme.  I love them because they focus on our marriage!  If our marriage isn't a priority our family structure crumbles. 

This week she is asking the question about the best getaway with Hubby.  There is two that come to mind.  One was the celebration of our 10th year of marriage and we went to a B&B in Stowe, Vermont.  We had never been to a B&B before and it was wonderful!!  It was the first time that I had ever left the kids overnight but they weren't too far away and they were being spoiled by my parents. 

The other time that sticks out in my mind was actually courtesy of the Army.  Every once in a while the Army comes in with a nice perk.  The chaplains hosted a Strongbonds weekends in Cape Cod.  There were classes on conflict resolution and practice sessions too.  They carved out lots of date time though.  They let us loose on Saturday, early in the afternoon to go explore and be together and focus on each other.  We found ourselves at Cold Stone Creamery, the first time we'd ever been, at dinner time, what a treat!  Then went and did a bit of sight seeing, hit the beach at dusk and sat in a life guard chair watching the stars come out.  I think we got some Chinese later on, but it was just so nice to be away from home and the phone and the computer and the kids to have uninterrupted conversation and connection.  I love being with my kids, don't get me wrong, but I love being with my husband too.  He's my best friend, my confidant.  I appreciate him and really enjoy spending time with him. 

After all this talk I think I need to plan another getaway!

Lent Day 7

I'm working through the Bible study Loved by God by Liz Curtis Higgs.  I did parts of it years ago with the ladies group at our church.  It has been good this time because I have been able to take my time and go through it on my own pace, which has been painfully slow.  Today I read where Jacob wakes up after dreaming about the ladder going into Heaven.  Genesis 28:16-17 reads:

Then Jacob awoke from his sleep and said, "Surely the Lord is in this place, and 

I did not know it."  And he was afraid and said, "How awesome is this place!  

This is none other than the house of God, and this is the gate of Heaven!"

The study went on to talk about the fear of the Lord and how this fear should be manifested in our lives.  God is with me, He's with me all the time.  Why doesn't my life always reflect that?  I'm not a bad person, I don't have things that are overtly evil in my life, but it's all the little things.  Like not having enough patience, or a TV show that is inappropriate, or a regimented quiet time with the Lord, or I could go on and on, but I think you know what I mean.  Why is not that reverence there all the time?  I fall into the "out of sight, out of mind" mentality so much.  Every day I need to wake up and say, "Surely the Lord is in the place!" because He is!  It's kind of a scary thought to me, but how much richer would life be if, consciously, every day remind myself that God is here.

This Week: Flying By!

This week has been going by at break-neck speeds!  I had high hopes of joining in on every one of the 40 days of Lent but that does mean that I can't start now! 

Hubby had drill with his army unit last weekend and the girls and I went along to hang out in the hotel and pool all weekend.  It was great fun to be together and having fun.  Belle jumped off the side of the pool for the very first time and found out how much fun that was.  On Sunday during lunch, Hubby threw us and curve ball and long story short we all went with him down to West Point to meet his division commander to tie up all those details that needed attention for his summer mission down there.  Another motive for going down was to see my friend who lives close to West Point.  We got to spend time with her and her kiddos and both of our families got to have dinner together.  It was so fun.  The trip back was long, but we all survived and can't wait for the opportunity to do it again.  But all that fun meant that we had to do extra school when we got back.  We crammed 4 days into 2 and then headed Friday night back down south to #1 house for AWANA games with my girls.  We have a frozen line going between the house and our septic and Hubby and his dad worked Saturday to get that crappy problem resolved.  Like that pun?  Okay, I know I'm getting boos!  And then back up north to make sure that we were in church on Sunday.  Have I mentioned how much I love the church that we go to?  The pastor is a straight from the heart kind of guy.  He makes my brain sweat.  Hubby coined that phrase, but I think he is so accurate.  The people are wonderful and so accepting of us.  It's been great. 

The busyness of life can easily get in the way of quiet time with God.  I have made excuses all week for not being in the Word, but it's not good enough.  You don't grow if you don't eat.  Lent has been in the back of my mind, nagging me to get back on the right path.  I'm glad to have this focus this Lent season.  I was discussing Lent with my brother and we were talking about how much we celebrate Christmas and the emphasis that we put on it.  Christmas is great and I love the Christmas season, but if Jesus was born, but never died and rose again, salvation would not exist.  We sang "In Christ Alone" yesterday at church.  I love this verse that pretty much sums up my beliefs:

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again

And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

Father God, thank you so much for sending your Son to die, to die for me.  Thank you for forgiveness, for wiping my slate clean, for choosing me to be one of your children.  I want to live the way that you want me to, I want to be unashamed.  Thank you for your mercy.  In Jesus's holy name, Amen.

The Queen of Gracefulness

I am married to a natural athlete.  He was a 3 sport varsity kind of guy.  I saw him water ski one time after saying how long it had been that he had been water skiing.  Of course he gets up on his first try and makes it look so easy!  I swear he can catch anything that is thrown to him, point being he can catch what I throw.  Belle takes after him.  The first time she played soccer, it was like her feet knew exactly what to do and she just did it.  I have to admit that I'm a tiny a bit jealous.  I have never been known for my athletic abilities, quite the contrary.  I always thought it was solely from my father's side until I saw my parents trip over each other and then it dawned on me that there is not a graceful gene anywhere in the gene pool that I came from.  My brother is 6"6' and my hubby calls him a waste-o-height due to his lack of any talent athletically, sorry Brother, but you know what I'm saying is totally the truth!  I like to think that we are gifted in so many other ways, right?  My brother is amazing musically.  I think he can play any instrument that is put in his hands.  And he picks up languages like nobody's business.  But athletics are not anywhere to be found in us.  Unfortunately I have passed a bit of this on to Ariel.  She is an over comer, I just know it.  She is half Hubby's, so she has half a shot to pull herself out of this! 

All this background to say that today I tripped down the stairs.  The very first time we came into this house and I saw the back stairs, steep and narrow, I knew this would be inevitable.  And today was the day.  I thought I would take the back stairs, a short cut to the laundry room, with basket full of laundry.  I was wearing my comfy socks, you know, those fuzzy, soft ones, and I was chatting with one of my kiddos.  Recipe for disaster!  When it was over and I was sitting on one of the last few steps figuring out exactly what was hurt and how badly it was hurt, I decided that I'd see a few bruises but that everything was intact and I giggled.  I texted Hubby who also giggled and reminisced about the last time I called to say that I fell down the stairs followed quickly by a trip to the ER and a cast on my leg for 8 weeks.  But now a couple hours after this most recent incident, I'm okay.  My toe still hurts and I'm a bit stiff, but a cast is not necessary!

The Stairs of Doom

Quotes from Devos

These are quotes that cannot be forgotten.  In the kids' devos yesterday, we were talking about understanding God and the whole concept of God living forever, that there is no beginning or end to God and that He created every thing big and small.  I asked them what the smallest thing was that God made and Belle says, "A mouse!" and I asked her to think smaller and the progression went to a fly then a flee and then I threw in a black fly.  Belle says, "God did not make black flies, Satan did!" to which Ariel says, "No, God created everything, but I bet there weren't black flies until Adam & Eve sinned."  So to sum up what we learned in devos today, black flies are evil. 

Today the question was, "What is your favorite thing that God created?" to which Belle responds, "My family and giraffes."  Ariel and I giggled and I'm thankful that at least we came before giraffes, but I guess they are pretty cool animals.  I truly believe that God has a sense of humor and I know that because of giraffes.

Scrapping

There are 7 bedrooms in this place.  One is a guest room, the two above the guest room aren't heated to full warmth and are empty, one is a playroom, Ariel and Belle have their own rooms but usually sleep together, and Hubby and I have a room.  There is another room, the Green Room, that isn't technically a bedroom because it is a walk through, but Ariel wanted it for a bedroom until it got too warm for her.  Since we moved her bed out of there two weeks after we moved here, it has remained empty, except for it being used as a restaurant by my budding waitresses.  My new friend from up here, Cat, asked me if I scrapbooked and if I had all my scraping stuff up here.  So the next time I went south, I brought all my stuff up and was thinking about setting it all up in my bedroom when I realized the Green Room would be a perfect location. 

So, I found a table in the barn and with the help of Ariel we hauled it up.  Of course I had to call Cat and she was over the next day and we scraped/talked for 6 hours.  And then the most amazing part was instead of packing everything up, I left it all out!  What a concept!!  Last night I was working on another page, I looked up to see Belle and Ariel bringing in their Barbies and playing on the floor.  I'm still working on Belle's baby book, I did a baby book for Ariel up to her first birthday, and they love looking at pictures of themselves from when they were little.  Oh my word, those babies were so cute.  I'm sure I'm biased.  The best part about this new scraping room is that I can just head up there for a few minutes at a time and putter away and not have to live with the chaos all over the dining room table.  This is my new favorite room of this house!

My Weighty Situation

I went to the doctor's a few weeks ago for a follow up to an issue from the fall.  The first stop at the docs is always that dreaded scale and when I stepped on it this time, I voiced my disdain of the numbers that appeared right out loud.  Oh my goodness!  How the heck did that number get so big?  Now, I understand exactly how it happened, I ate way too much.  So, here is my public declaration, I am going to eat less and move more.  I have to.  That number is way too depressing!  I bought a scale a couple weeks ago to track my progress, and though I still cry at the number, it seems to be going in the right direction now.  I have learned to enjoy my elliptical and sweat, and cutting portions has not really been difficult, most of the time.  I'm down about 4 pounds and that is such great motivation to keep away from the bad stuff.  I'll post progress for more motivation.

Enjoying the Snow

Lord of all creation

Of water, earth and sky

The heavens are your tabernacle

Glory to the Lord on high! 

I'm not much of a winter outdoors woman.  I'd much rather sit by the fire drinking coffee and being warm.  But yesterday I put on my snow duds and headed out with my family for some vitamin D and oxygen.  It was so beautiful outside, the blanket of new snow covering all the muddy slush.  Sitting indoors was too hard to resist and I'm so glad that I did.  We went snow shoeing on a few trails that we have yet to check out since moving in.  It led to an open field where there was a little cabin that was put there by the owners when they lived here.  It was so quiet outside and cloudless.  Peaceful is a good word to describe it.  Belle was all about making snow angels but could not ever get herself up with those snow shoes on!  Both girls are so observant and it is fun to see the world through their eyes.  After a bit of exploring on snow shoes, we went back to the house and ran the snowmobiles around the trails too.  Snowmobiling!  One of my favorite things to do in the wintertime.  The smell of the exhaust makes me remember when Hubby and I used to go snowmobiling when we were first together.  We went often before the kiddos came along!  Now it's fun to go with them.  The girls have a little 120 cc snowmobile that was given to them by their big cousin.  They have been having tons of fun running that little machine around.

Daddy giving the safety briefing to Ariel before she runs her snow mobile

Snow shoeing on the trail, heading into the field

Ariel in the middle of the field in front of the house

International Travel

The very first time I saw Hubby in his dress blues I had to know what all the medals and pins were for.  As we were going through his ribbons there was a very pretty one that was rainbow colored.  He told me that was for overseas training.  Of course my mind went exotic and I wondered what cool place he had been to when he told me Canada.  When you live in New England, Canada is closer than New Jersey.  Of course I had to burst out laughing and he giggled right along with me.

Now please keep this little story of mine in mind when I announce that we were international travelers today.   Since our move north brought us even closer to that border, the next stop on the interstate to be exact, we have wanted to cross over.  Why?  Because we can, I suppose.  The town that we went to is not as big as the one we live in, but everything was written in English and in French and that was pretty cool.  Not to mention it was Belle's first time across the border.  It was a pretty uneventful trip, we had dinner over there and came back, but we did make friends with the border patrol officer on the American side.  Always good to have friends.  Of course my camera was left at home by the computer, so guess we'll have to go again to document better.

9 Years Ago

At 5:50 am on this day 9 years ago, labor began and life as Hubby and I knew, was forever altered.  After 9 hours of labor and a Cesarean Section, a beautiful child with red fuzz on her head entered into our lives and turned our world upside down.  I remember crying all the way home from the hospital, hormones raging, knowing that I was not going to know what I was doing as a mother.  We carried her, in her car carrier seat into the living room, sat her on the ottoman, and I remember asking Hubby, "What do we do now?" and at that precise moment, she scrunched up her little face and noises came from that tiny, precious baby that I only thought a grown man could make, to which I responded, "I know what to do now!"  Over the past 9 years, she has never ceased to amaze me with her insights, tenderness and humor.

We are at #1 House and last night Belle spent the night with Hubby's parents, across the street, so when we woke up this morning, it was only Ariel and I in the house.  I had purchased her a set of scrubs for her birthday and gave those to her, but her big present was a bike and we wanted her to be able to pick out the exact one she wanted.  She was very excited about going to school and be with her friends on her birthday, so we made a sheet cake of brownies, frosted them and decorated it with a "Happy Birthday Ariel!" complete with sprinkles and 9 candles.  I picked her up at school early along with a friend of hers, KJ, and headed to the city for a movie and dinner.  We met Hubby at the theater and saw Gnomeo and Juliet in 3-D, very cute, then headed to tell her about her gift and pick it out!  She found a perfect bike at Target, cute, pink and very girly.  Next it was off to the Olive Garden for dinner with Grandparents, Aunt, Uncle & cousins.  They brought her out a cake and candle and made her feel very special.  KJ was a good addition to our family that night and I think the girls got a bit of sleep that night but they did have tons of fun.

As a mom of a 9 year old, I had trouble getting a grip on my emotions first thing in the morning.  Hubby and I have always been quick to remind each other that our kids are going to be grown and gone before we know it.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those moms who is going to need her kids to stay nearby, quite the contrary, I want them to be where ever God wants them, where ever they feel led to go.  I want them to go to college and fall in love and have their own family, where ever that may be, but for now I want to savor them, keeping in mind that the future will be here before I know it.  Nine is half way to 18.  Half way to the future.  Sobering for this mom.  It's hard to remember life before Ariel, she had just brought so much joy to us.  I'm so proud of her and the way that she is growing up, but I just don't want her to grow up too, too fast, but I feel at times that if I blink that I will miss it!  So, I am going to continue to savor it and make many memories with her.

My girl in her new scrubs

 Gotta love the 3-D glasses!!

A card from Papa & Mimi

 Our waitress was wonderful and brought her a cake with a candle!

 Mmmm!  Cake!

A Furreal Newborn Friend from Auntie & Uncle R & Cousins

Thursdays Tied with Love and Laughter

Jen at  Thursdays Tied with Love and Laughter  asks the question, "What is your love language?"

This cracks me up because hubby and I have had many giggles over this.  I love this book and we took a marriage class at a local local church a few years ago and touched on this book one of those nights.  My husband's love language would have to be Acts of Service and Physical Touch.  He's the get it done guy.  He's the I will provide for my family guy.  While I am most definitely a Quality Time girl.  I just want to be with him and hang out with him and have a conversation with him.  So, while he busies himself with loving me, I just go hang around him.  We stacked wood together last week.  Great conversation and a great work out too.  One of these days we just may master loving each other.... 

I got involved in the FRG, or Family Readiness Group, at his Army Reserve Unit, to spend more time with him while he works to provide for us.  This is us at the Army when he was promoted to Lieutenant Colonel back in March.

Chicken

We went to McDonalds two days ago.  Belle says, "Momma, I want what I usually get."  The cashier cracked up as I placed her order, "Chicken nugget happy meal, please".  When we sat down, she she was looking strangely at the box the nuggets came in and said, "Why is there a chicken on here?"  I said matter of factly, "'Cuz it's chicken."  She got this look of horror on her face and pushed the box away, refusing to eat it.  I asked her what she thought it was before and she just shrugged her shoulder.  Where has this child been?  She told me that she didn't think that that kind of chicken was that chicken.  You have to hear this other story to fully appreciate what was going through my mind.  I have a friend that when her daughter was around 2 or not quite 2 and was going through the, "What's that?" stage, she did it at dinner time with her potatoes, carrots and finally chicken.  When her mom says, "That's chicken," the 2 year old responds with, "Bock, Bock?" and mom tells her yes, she refused to eat it.  Belle knows this story well and has reenacted it many times.  Which is why I will again ask the question, where has this child been?  Later that night at my in-laws, Mum asked us if we wanted to eat dinner with them the next night to which my kids obviously said yes!  Mum said she would roast a chicken, and Belle looks at me with that look again.  When she went out of the room, I told Mum the story and she thought it was a riot and wondered if she would eat it or not.  Guess what?  She did not eat it!  She loves chicken but that was before she knew it was...well, chicken.

Betwix and Between

Today as I driving south to #1 House, as Belle calls it, so the kids could be a part of Day 100 celebrations, I had the weirdest feeling.  It's hard to put into words, but maybe I can explain it like this.  When I am focused on something, I get frustrated when I am inturrupted.  Maybe it's because I'm not smart enough to have two thoughts at a time in my brain or maybe it's because I'm so intent on doing the task well that everything else dissappears into the background.  My focus recently has been at #2 House.  We have settled in nicely and we do miss our friends, but we have made new friends and focused on making the new place a home.  So, as I'm diving south, I'm thinking it seems strange.  But that thought in itself was strange.  Does that make any sense?  Before settling in up north, before we had a new church family, before we had friends, our focus was on how quick we could get back home.  Now more and more up north feels like home and it feels nice.  I don't have the constant drive to want to come back south.  Don't get me wrong, I want to come back down, eventually, but finally we are content where we are.  My thoughts go the passage in Philippians 4.  Here's what the NIV says:

 ¹⁰ I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. ¹¹ I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. ¹² I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. ¹³ I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

Paul is in prison at the time that he writes because of his faith in Christ and his proclomation of faith and obviously I'm not saying that my circumstance is dire as his was, but the message is that our faith in God is where comfort and contentment really is. 

I went to church tonight down here, the girls were excited to get to go to AWANA and I was glad to just be there, but again, that feeling of not belonging crept in again.  It was not because I was not accepted by my friends there, on contrary, I got tons of hugs.  It was me.  I guess I can look at it this way...we are where God wants us up north and we are content.  I've decided this is a good thing.

My Day Book

Link to they Day Book at February Day Book

Today's Day Book for February 15th

Outside my window it is cold and the snow is blowing!  We got about 9" yesterday and last night.

I am thinking that I need to get a jump start on my day, I have much to accomplish!

I am thankful for my kids and the fact that I get to stay home with them and teach them everyday.


From the learning rooms  Belle is doing a great job reading, but she moans every time I break a book out.  I think that I need to make sure that we are reading everyday to make her more confident.  Ariel is learning about Spain and I keep thinking that I want to start her on a foreign language, but it's hard to just get the regular school done, let alone adding another elective.


From the kitchen  Burgers are on on tap for tonight.  We have a friend that raises beef cattle and it is so nice to know where our meat comes from.  Last night we had a special Valentines dinner of gnocci with vodka sauce, Ceasar salad and garlic bread that got a bit toasty under the broiler as I was multitasking.  The girls cut out brownies in heart shapes and frosted them, they were so good!! 

I am wearing my PJ's still.  I got them for Christmas and they are so comfy.  Flannel plaid pants and a thermal shirt are just so hard to get out of in the morning.

I am creating my blog.  It's a ton of fun and addicting.  Next time I head down south, tomorrow, I'm going to bring my scrapbook stuff.  That will be fun to start working on again.

I am going back down south tomorrow.  The girls are excited to be able to go to school and see their friends.  Why is there always so much to do before a short trip?

I am reading  the Red Glove Series by Karen Kingsbury.  I'm having trouble getting into it.  I just may have to swap it out for the David Baldacci book that I bought Hubby for Christmas.

I am hoping  that we get through school easily today.  The girls would like to have the whole day off tomorrow so that we can stop and do some shopping tomorrow on the way back down south but this means that they have to get their work done prior.  They seem pretty motivated, so I hoping!!!

I am hearing the morning news.  Right now there is a story about a sickness from the Playboy Mansion.  All I can do is giggle.  I can also hear the girls in the kitchen getting their breakfast together.  They are being very sweet to each other. 

Around the house  my elliptical is staring at me saying....use me!  use me!  I have been doing really good the past three weeks and I'm waiting to see results.  The whole plan is to move more and eat less!  If I keep repeating my mantra, maybe it will work.  I can tell my cardio is getting better already, that is motivation in itself. 

One of my favorite things  is this nice big chair I'm sitting in.  Hubby has this idea about 4 recliners and a big screen TV in a "Man Cave".  I giggled at first, but as I sit here reclining, I think it was a great idea!  The sun is shining in the window and it's just a good feeling.

A few plans for the rest of the week besides driving south is doing some organizing at our house down south and maybe a visit to a few friends.  Friday is Ariel's birthday and I'm excited about celebrating with her.

Here is a picture for thought I am sharing

The view out my window.  I love how a new snow covers and makes the landscape looks to clean and pristine. 

Happy Valentines Day!

Valentines Day in elementary school always seemed awkward to me.  I tried pick appropriate valentines to give people.  I didn't want to give the "I'm sweet on you!" to any of the boys and I never wanted to give them to the girls either.  In high school the pressure was always on to have a Valentine.  I'm not sure if I ever did have one but pressure remains burned in my memory.  Then college.  Ugh.  More pressure to be working on that MRS degree.  I remember dating a boy and using the phrase "I love you" and feeling strange about it.  I'm old fashioned and wanted that to be reserved for the one.  I really hoped that he was the one, but still using the phrase was odd to me.  I remember talking to my mom one day and asking how a person could know that they were in love.  Maybe she sensed my hesitation and responded something to the effect that if I was truly in love that I probably wouldn't be asking the question.  That left me with more questions than answers.  I truly wanted to fall in love and be with my soul mate, my one and only, the one who God had perfectly designed for me and here's my mom telling me nothing more than, "You'll just know".  I don't like those kind of answers.  I'm a doer.  Tell me what to do, and I'll get it done for you.  I don't like vagueness.  I'm not a good mind reader.  I'm not a game player.  What you see is what you get.  I am me.  So when I ask, "How do I know if I'm in love," I need the Top Ten List of How to Know I Am In Love, or give me a three point sermon and I'll follow it.  Little did I know that at that point my father is praying that I will get through college with out all the distractions of boys.  As graduation rapidly approached, campus became a diamond mine.  It seemed that everyday someone else was getting engaged.  I was happy for them, but wondered where and when it would be my turn.  As only God can do, my path of least resistance got me to a college for an internship where I went to a local church.  I attended there with a friend of mine from college and she introduced me to this very handsome man who asked if I would like to go out to dinner with him.  I accepted and right away I fell for this guy.  I remember calling home to tell my parents that I was going on date #3 with  a boy I met at church and they came up immediately to meet him.  On a phone call only a couple weeks later, I asked Mom if she remembered 3 years back to the how-do-I-know-if-I'm-in-love conversation and she did.  I remember just giving a whoop of joy over the phone to let her know that I knew.  When he proposed only 4 months after we met, I remember mom making a comment like, "I have no idea what took him so long!"  We were married almost a year to the day that we met.  Marriage is not perfect, in fact sometimes it's just hard work, but it is so worth it.  We have had many fun Valentines Days together.  I remember the Valentines Day of 2002, I was 4 days away from Ariel's delivery and I was huge.  Hubby gave me a beautiful necklace with a heart pendant on it that I am wearing today.  We talked about it being our last Valentines Day alone, with out children.  Valentines Day of 2005, Hubby was in Iraq and the girls and I all got flowers for him via his sister.  It's not the presents and flowers that make Valentines special, it's the thought behind it all, the special day set aside to reflect on love and the blessings that God has given us.

This morning I was served breakfast in bed by my two little Valentines.  Hubby and I were ordered back to bed by the little tyrants while they heated up left over pancakes and made coffee.  As we waited, we talked about how quickly they had gotten so big, how time goes by way too fast.  The girls and I went to the grocery store to get our supplies for our annual surprise fancy dinner for Daddy that I started long before they came along.  It's one of my gifts to my husband.  I hope he'll like it....actually, I know he will.  He always has.  He is so good to me!

Belle vs. the Radio

Hubby worked at home for most of the day today.  It was nice to have him around.  Not that he really interacts with us much when he's working, but it's just nice to know that he is around.  It balances out the times that he is away from us.  We were sitting in the same room this morning and he has his radio on, making sure that he wasn't missing anything, and it can be loud and annoying sometimes.  I honestly don't know how they stand it all the time, but I guess after listening to it for 17 years you kind of tune it out.  Something like I do with the kids, right?  Anyway, Belle is eying the radio and scowling when all of a sudden she says, "I just want to push that button and say, 'Shut up!  Mark is on a break!'".  I started busted out laughing but told her not to touch it.  Hubby is giggling himself and says, "Why do you think that you shouldn't do that?" and her reply was, "because I think that you wouldn't have a job any more and I think you like your job!"  Of course her eyes were shining and she was giggling, but she knew what she was talking about.   

An Award!

A huge thanks to my friend, Lisa at The Berry Patch who gave me the Stylish Award!  How cool!  Thanks so much, Lisa, your blog inspires me in so many different ways!

The rules are rather straight-forward....

1. Thank and link back to the person (or people) who awarded you this award
2. Share 7 things about yourself
3. Award 15 recently discovered great bloggers
4. Contact these bloggers and tell them about the award.

Seven Things About Me

1.  I am married to the most amazing man in the entire world.  Being married to my best friend and waking up next to him everyday is a blessing straight from God.  We met and married with in a year, 13 years ago.  I'm such a lucky girl.
2.  I have two girls that mean the world to me.  They amaze me everyday with the things they come up with and how much they take in.  They are growing way too fast and if I think about it too much, I'll cry.
3.  I have a bachelors degree in Athletic Training from Houghton College which is what ultimately brought me to Maine.  I spent my first year of college at Word of Life Bible Institute, studying the Bible.  I'd recommend it to anyone!
4.  I have lived in 6 states.  My dad was a pastor and we moved often!  I think it gave me a big sense of adventure and ready for anything.
5.  I am an Army Wife.  Hubby is in the Army Reserve and is the commander of his battalion.  I feel lucky that he has only been on one deployment.  He was in Iraq for a year and it was so hard, but by the grace of God, we made it though!
6.  I love to cook!  Baking is so fun!  I enjoy experimenting with recipes and creating new things.  Food network is just about my most favorite thing to watch on TV.
7.  The most important thing to me, besides all of this, is my faith in God.  He has blessed me beyond belief and continues to do so.  It never ceases to amaze me.


Passing it on

I know that I have a few postings dating way back, I really am new to getting into blogging.  I don't have very many blogs that I follow, but here are the ones that I do....

1.  'Sup bros...this is the Breaus!  Laura is a friend of mine and an Air Force wife.  Her hubby is currently on deployment but she is always upbeat and she has many adventures in Japan.
2.  barefoot in barcelona  Keri was my flower girl and is now attending Gordon College.  Her blog is about her adventures in her semester abroad in Barcelona and her stories are so good!
3.  Ross Family  This one is personal to me.  It's my cousin's wife's blog.  I have yet to met her in person, but through her blog, I am getting to know her and their adorable daughter, Emma.
4.  Sylvester Family  This is another cousin, Katie, who I don't get to see often but love to keep up with her blog and pictures of her growing family.
5.  Our Family Forest  This is my amazing friend, Jen.  I have no idea how she does all she does.

That's it!  It's all I got.  4 is a far cry from 15, but it's what I've got!

Wednesday Night Mayhem

Yesterday, Wednesday, we had a great start to our day!  We had a new friend come over in the morning.  She has two little boys, one almost 3 and the other 3 months.  It made me remember how much work little ones are.  The oldest was so cute playing with mine and of course mine ate it up!  Ariel was in her glory playing with the oldest and then switching gears to croon over the baby.  She is going to be a great babysitter one day soon.  The friend left before lunch, we finished school, the girls played in the snow and we made a trip into town.  Valentine's Day is approaching much more rapidly than I had thought it would and I had to get the girls Valentines for their friends and get them into the mail.  So, summing up our great day, I'm not sure when the "grumpies" moved in.  Can adults be over-stimulated?  Oh, you thought I was saying that my kids were grumpy?  Not a chance.  It was all me.  Fast forward to about 5pm.  I'm getting supper together, hubby is running later than I thought, the potatoes are now out of the oven and getting cold, hubby walks through the door hungry, but I didn't want to put the steaks on too soon.  So, I popped the 'taters back in the oven, threw the steaks on to my George Foreman grill and then a quick e-mail check.  Went to check on the steaks a few minutes later and they were looking great.  Hubby likes his a bit more done so I took three off and left one on.  The grill starts smoking a bit and the smoke detector responds appropriately.  This is all well and good because it's not attached to anything, I can just wave it around and move it to another room.  But I didn't tend to it immediately and Ariel, fingers in her ears, runs into the kitchen and starts shouting, THE FIRE ALARM IS GOING OFF!  THE FIRE ALARM IS GOING OFF!  To which I respond, I KNOW!  Then she starts yelling, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP!!!!  Seriously, who does that?  What on earth would possess someone to mimic a fire alarm?  Isn't it annoying enough on it's own?  I think this is the point where I started yelling myself.  Of course a mother yelling doesn't really calm the situation down and having a case of the grumpies didn't help either.  Ariel runs off giggling as I'm reaching for the fire alarm.  I'm proud to say that everyone is still alive this morning, but probably a bit deaf.

You're not crazy mom!

I feel like I live on that precipice of insanity at all times.  I think I like it here, not knowing whether or not I will fall over the ravine, kinda makes me feel alive!  I have a friend that is a mental health nurse and I asked her one time, "If I know that I'm crazy, I'm not right?  Because that is the thing that makes me know I'm sane."  Her reply was something to the effect of crazy people do know they are crazy.  Great!  Now what is the benchmark of knowing the sane from the insane? 

Today hubby went into work later than usual, which meant that school was put aside for games of Crocodile and hanging out with Daddy.  Some things are more important.  So at 3:30 pm when Ariel was still doing school work and very frustrated with the whole thing that I decided to inject some humor and just be silly.  She looks at me, like only tween girl can, and rolls her eyes at me.  But I can see that she is no longer in her frustrated state, she has that glint in her rolling eyes that tells me that my silliness is working.  So I said to her, "I know, Momma is crazy!"  Belle, sitting on my lap, pipes up, "You're not crazy, Momma!!!  You are normal!"  To which I burst out laughing as did Ariel.  So I asked her if she was sure and she said she was.  I then asked, "Okay then, who is crazy?" and you know she said it was her sister.  It amazes me how quickly kids pick up on humor and how easily they incorporate it into their everyday language.  I'm so glad that my kids have a sense of humor, it's a good way to cope with the tough things that come along in life.  I'm glad they can laugh at themselves, I think it will make them stronger human beings. 

Hubby is off ice fishing tonight with some of his Trooper buddies.  They have done this for the past several years and it's always a hike to their fishing local.  Funny thing is, now we only live about 20 minutes away from it.  The girls and I are going to get a pizza and have a fun girls night complete with a pajama party in Momma's bed, as they call it.  Often when he is away they want to sleep with me.  Too soon they will be bigger and not want to hang with me.  I'm going to cherish these insane days but fun PJ party nights.

Pretzels

I love to watch Food Network.  One show we all enjoy in Throwdown with Bobby Flay.  One recent episode was Bobby taking on Big Daddy Pretzel from Philly.  They had a soft pretzel throwdown and Bobby actually won!  If you have seen the show you know that he usually does not win.  My family was oooo-ing and ahh-ing at the sight of the pretzels and I was thinking they didn't look to difficult to make.  Food Network posted his recipes and after checking it out decided that it would be a fun family activity and it actually was!!!  After waiting forever for the dough to rise, according to Ariel, all 4 of us formed our snakes and made pretzel shapes popped them into the oven.  Ohmyyummyness, they were good! 

Not every time I find a new recipe or think of a fun thing to make does it turn out okay.  In fact, the girls and I were watching TLC's Cake Boss and Buddy was talking about Irish Soda Bread.  Ariel asked what it was and I didn't know, so thank goodness for Google, we found out.  Looking at a recipe it looked easy and yummy, very similar to the recipe I use for biscuits.  When all was said and done, the bread was good, but burned on the outside and still gooey on the inside.  Guess I'll have to try that again and make sure the oven temp is accurate. 

As far as the pretzels go, we all had a blast and we are looking forward to making them again!  Having something that everyone really enjoys is not always easy, but this was a hit!  Here's the link to the recipe... Bobby Flay's Soft Pretzels

A Hole In My Pants

I had a pair of gray pants that were my absolute favorite.  They were perfect.  My legs are long and the length was perfect.  There was a touch of lycra in them, which made them feel perfect.  They didn't sit high on my waist, my waist is low, and they fit perfect.  I wore them all the time.  They were my go-to pants.  I bought them at an outlet so I knew that I would never be able to find another pair.  And then it happened!  I went into the outlet that I bought them at 2 years later, and there they were!  Not only were they in gray, but in black, tan and brown, to which my wonderful husband said, "Buy them all!!".  And I did. 

Fast forward 2 years.  Now I have 3 favorite pants.  The same gray one, but newer, black and brown.  The tan is in the back of my closet because it is not my favorite, it shows too many thigh dimples, which I think is sharing way too much information.  I think I wear the black pair the most.  I have a gray and black sweater that is long that I adore and wear far too much with my favorite black pants.  I wore the black pants to Thanksgiving, to which my sister in law replies, "Oh!  You wore those last year and I cringed last year because of all the dog hair you were going to get on you!"  See, I told you I wear them too much.  I wore those black pants with a new sweater vest and white button down shirt for my hubby's promotion.  I wore them to the Christmas Party we had for the army unit that hubby is in the first of December.  When I went to put them on two Sundays after Christmas, I gasped.  There was a hole in the seam on the backside of those pants.  I can deal with holes.  It is right on the seam.  Give me my trusty sewing machine and 5 minutes and I'll make them look new again.  The reason I gasped is when the heck did that hole appear?  When I dress, it's usually in a hurry with 1000 questions being thrown at me all at once.  So, did I wear them with a hole in it to the Christmas Party?  To the promotion and the Christmas Party?  Please some one tell me that it just happened or at least I was smart enough to wear black undies so no one could tell.  But I cannot answer these questions.  So is it possible that I went to the Army Christmas Party, where my husband is the commander and I'm the head of the Family Group and people are always looking at us, with a hole in those favorite black pants in my hiney?   I remember how many times I bent over to get more information for the family members under my display table.  And the times that I picked rouge craft items off the floor.  And the time I squatted down to speak with the rep from Senator Collins office so I could talk to her face to face while she was sitting at the table.  Someone would have said something to me, right?  Right?  Would I tell someone if they had a hole in their pants? 

The pants are now fixed.  I will wear them tomorrow.  But I don't think I will ever look at them the same again and I will always check to make sure all seams are secure when I put pants on forevermore. 

Let's go bowling!!

The joys of living upstate and not knowing any one is living upstate and not knowing anyone! We have lots of free days. It has it's perks and I have decided that I am going to focus on that and not so much on the things that we miss about our crazyness down south. So, today is Thursday and I was thinking that the girls got their passports in the mail this week and since there are no plans for the weekend, gasp!, that we might be able to go get some stamps in those pristine books of theirs. After hubby and I chatted about the possibility in the early morning hours this morning, the girls came down stairs and we asked, what do you want to do Saturday? With out hesitation, Belle says, Let's go bowling!!!!!! To which we all crack up. It was like she was all practiced and waiting for the question to come. She is growing so fast, it amazes me when I look at her that 6 years of her life have passed. And Ariel, I have no idea where the little red head has gone to. She is so grown up in all that she does that she amazes me that she is my child. As I type this, she is on the phone with a new friend of hers. When did that start, the when did the I-am-my-own-person thing happen? I was trying to think of the first time I had a gab session on the phone. I hate talking on the phone, what am I thinking? That trait came directly from my father.

It's snowing again. It's not quite as cold as it has been. I'm so grateful to God for all that He has blessed us with. Whether it is snow or freezing temperatures, He always looks out for us and guides our paths and I'm just thankful.

"Not too cook-y, Momma."

First play date in our new house was so fun! At church we met a family who home schools and their two youngest are the same age as ours. So, in preparation for them coming over, I made our favorite cookies, Molasses Spice. Belle comes in and says, "Don't make them too cook-y, Momma, I like those cookies chewy." Huh? I reply, "You mean don't cook them too much?" Belle, "Yup, Momma, I don't like them crunchy when you cook-y them too much". Well, I guess they passed the test, because I lost count of how many she ate.

1046

1046 is one of my favorite 10 codes that the troopers use. It means in custody, or as I like to put it...off to jail with the bad guy! The reason it is so near and dear to my heart is that my hubby is a Crisis Negotiator. When someone has holed himself up and vows to shoot anyone who comes near, my brave husband races to the scene all over the state to try to talk some sense into him/her. Living way up here, it is a long trip to anywhere, and travel time to most negotiations is over 3 hours. The best thing for us girls is when hubby gets all suited up, gets in the car, only to return to the house a few minutes later to yell at the top of his lungs...1046!!!!!! Sometimes he'll be gone only a little bit and we'll get the 1046 phone call. We love that! There have been times where the 1046 comes, but only after he is almost to the scene. Those times are not so much fun. I know that he enjoys being on the Negotiation Team and enjoys his job on the team, but travel time kills the joy at times. So, hubby just left to travel about 2 hours to a call, and the girls and I are praying for a quick 1046 so he can be home for dinner! In the mean time, we pray for safety and courage and wisdom for the words to say.

The Adventures of Home Schooling

One thing I never wanted to do was home school. Not because I didn't think I was capable, but because I thought there was much more opportunity else where for the kids. Being a kid that moved a lot growing up, I know what it is like to have to adjust not only to a new town, but a new house, new neighbors, new friends, new church and a new school. We decided to do the home school thin for a number of reasons. First of all the curriculum the girls were using at their school lends it self very well to home schooling, secondly, we have no idea how long we will be here and we thought that adjustment might be better for the kids doing it this way. Ariel and I had our moments at the beginning. She wanted to make sure that mom had rules and regulations like her teacher did and she pushed all the limits. Through trial and error, and much prayer, I think we have gotten into a groove. I still think she is much smarter than I. Belle, on the other hand, has only known me as a teacher. She had almost 2 month in real school before we moved but has adjusted nicely to home school. She's reading and amazes me all the time! I tell people that I hope I don't screw them up too badly and she told me once, momma, you won't screw me up. Gotta love the faith of a child. The girls are able to keep up with their peers and have been able to go back to their school a few times, another one of the reasons that we opted for this route in schooling. Ariel's teacher has been very kind and is helping me find my way through this adventure. I have a new appreciation for teachers and home schooling moms. I adore my children and am loving being with them and teaching them. It still makes me awe struck when they get a concept for the first time and the light goes on. I'm thankful for this opportunity to be involved in this area of my kids' life.